Testosterone Tuesday

Ladies, the following is exclusively for men so please stop reading. Why are you still reading? Just kidding, read and learn why men have an advantage over women when it comes to losing weight and how easy it is for them to increase that advantage without even exercising.

A few weeks ago a good friend of mine asked me to post information that will help men lower their body fat levels.

Here comes the bad, and what women feel to be unfair news and fact: Men have an average of 10 to 20 times more testosterone than women. Testosterone builds muscle. Muscle gain increases metabolism, and a higher metabolism aids in fat loss. Sorry women, please file your complaints with the “Human Evolution” department.

Men, if you want to lose fat resulting in muscle tone and definition, and if you want to stop adding notches to your increasing belt size, or even worse, having to buy new belts, OPTIMIZE YOUR TESTOSTERONE LEVELS!

Optimal Testosterone

I will not bore you with medical jargon regarding testosterone and other anabolic hormones for two reasons. One, I like to keep it simple. And two, endocrinology is not my specialty. But I did stay at a Holiday Inn last night.

Testosterone Optimizing Protocol.

1. If you have some excess pounds on your body, like 20 and beyond, losing weight will definitely aid you in increasing your testosterone levels and optimizing other hormones like insulin, cortisol, and HGH.

3 guys belly

2. Reduce your alcohol consumption. Drinking excessively can cause aromatization of testosterone, turning it into estrogen. Estrogen is the hormone that makes women women, and some men, womanly. This is one reason heavy drinking males have “man boobs” aka, “moobs”. Dudes with moobs probably don’t have optimal T levels. “YOU CAN”T HANDLE THE TRUTH!!’ ( This is not how man who played a Marine General should ever look. And a real former Marine should never look like this either). Marines are supposed to be lean-mean fighting machines.


3. I am not telling you not to drink, but if possible cut back on those adult beverages. You will lose weight and increase T levels in the process. Beer bellies are not in right now.


I don’t know if the above picture is real or not, but if it is real. WOW!!!

3. Reduce stress levels as much as possible. Stress increases cortisol, which is also a hormone. Cortisol and testosterone do not work together, like Republicans and Democrats. And although consuming alcohol is not the best stress buster for you, it does work, so choose wisely.Try to do stuff you enjoy and takes your mind off of things without drinking to de-stress. That is the best thing for you and your T levels.


4. GET YOUR SLEEP! I know, I know, we live in a society where it is almost a badge of honor to say “Oh I only slept 4 hours last night, and I feel fine”. Yes, that can be quite impressive, but that is not the best thing for you. And how do you feel with your”sleep deprivation” badge of honor? If you’re sleep deprived often, you probably feel like shit, you’re tired, get sick easily,and your face and eyes are all puffy much of the time.


The body recovers mentally and physically while you sleep. Why do you think that you have slept a third of your life. For the math challenged, if you are 30 you have slept roughly 10 years! Also men, you wake up happy (pitching a tent) in the morning because your body is busy at work during your sleep, producing testosterone. Your gonads are active while you snooze. GET YOUR SLEEP!

sleeping couple

5. Optimize your vitamin D levels. The best way to do this is…no, not a supplement. Get your man cave dwelling, air-conditioned loving, cubicle warfare participating, TV watching, sun screen wearing, afraid of skin cancer butt outdoors. Direct sunlight is the best way to optimize your vitamin D levels. I am not asking you to be in the sun hours per day, 20 minutes a day or so will do. Or you can really get creative and kill 2 birds with one stone by exercising outside. (The dude below is 41 years young).



6. Eliminate processed sugar from your diet. And if I here one my person tell me “Fruit has sugar, why is that ok?”, or “Healthy Homeboy you’re always advising me to cut back on sugar, but I see you eat fruit all the time, what gives?”, I think I’m going to have a real fit. I am talking about the sugar below.


7. Get some blood work done to find out if you are deficient in anything. Vitamin D, Zinc, B vitamin levels, and other stuff they can test you for is very important to know. You can also get tested for your Testosterone levels. That may answer questions like: Why are you so emotional all the time (excess estrogen)? Why are you so tired all the time? Why doesn’t your friend Woody visit as often as he used to? And why do you just feel like shit more and more? (Shit gets a bad rap. But in the end, it is just poop).

The above protocol should be done and committed to before any man over 40 even thinks about working out or taking one of the Testosterone supplements that are promoted everywhere to increase T levels.

If your yin-yang twins haven’t been working correctly lately, yin-yang twins produce T by the way, it is not because of a blue or yellow pill deficiency. My protocol will help those meds work better too.  I never lie when I write/blog, unless I am writing fiction. This is not fictitious.


Generic Cialis5

Stay tuned for workouts that will hep boost your testosterone levels. With the above protocol and a good workout routine, you will lower your body fat levels, increase muscle mass, and feel better in no time. Your significant other will be happy too.


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